The Worst Idea

Standing around a tight circle I drop a match and release a puff of methane from the camping cylinder using a nail wedged between it and the ground. A blue fireball woofs to life engulfing my hand and tickling me with its heat as it spreads and glows orange at edges. 

“Oohs” and “ahs” escape from assembled neighbor boys. A giggle and an exclamation, “More!”

The cylinder was empty so now it was time for the “napalm” So we named the flammable solidified plastic formed when a solvent dissolves poly-styrene. I break a piece of the fragile substance off and hold up what looks like a dirty and wet piece of glass. Set it on the ground, light it on fire and then poke at it to move around as it burns. 

Reassuring noises emanate from the onlookers, and I’m satisfied. Next time I assure them, it will be a grand finale. I had been saving up styrofoam for weeks in preparation. 

After everyone left, I arranged the foam on the floor in a single layer and watched delightedly as it melted when I poured gasoline upon it and then stirred it around. Now was the time for waiting as the gelatine mixture had to harden. 

Close the garage door and back into the house to wait. Perhaps I’ll nap.

Slam! 

“Dan!” I awoke with a startle.

“Get your ass down here!”

Knowing I was in trouble and alive with that knowledge, I hurried downstairs to find my fate. 

blue coat

karma

stormy

bicycle

grass

sailboat

hungry

radiator

scream

glass

Shane was excited. Today was the day. 

He grabbed his blue coat hanging on the hook beside the workroom door and pressed the button to open the garage. 

He ran over and grabbed his bicycle, double-checked all of the joints and the safety chain connecting his invention to the bike and took off towards the lake. 

Erratically he pedaled, his mini-sailboat in tow ignoring the screaming, screeching traffic stopping to make way for Shane and his unlikely bike/boat coupling as he raced by.

Reaching the end of the grass he took in the sight of a calm lake. Not a ripple, as smooth as glass. “Damn” he cursed under his breath, just his karma. Perhaps he should have left earlier when there was still a breeze.

Never mind he begrudgingly reminded himself as he had brought the paddle, and didn’t need the sails for this adventure. 

He removed the boat from the ersatz trailer and placed it at the edge of the water. Carefully he broke down the trailer and bike into smaller pieces and lashed them to the deck of the dingy. He climbed into the boat and pushed off making small ripples that reached off towards the shores, removed the paddle from storage and slowly, gingerly rowed his construction across the lake to the other side. 

About halfway across, his stomach began to growl and he felt hungry. Also clouds had begun to move in, the weather had begun to look stormy. 

Paddle quicker was the thought that crossed his mind and he looked down to see a rain drop splash about 20 yards away.